Tag Archives: dogs

Josie’s Dreams

Photo by Steph Munden on Pexels.com

Jackie Wells-Fauth

I read an interesting article the other day. According to some study out there, dogs dream all the time. And more than that, their dreams are about us, their owners. I’m not sure who interviewed the canines for this or how it was accomplished, but how interesting.

I looked at my dog, Josie, lying on the floor, just waking up from her tenth nap of the day. She blinked up at me and I said, “You must have a lot of nightmares.”

She simply yawned and went back to sleep. She has nothing to worry about as long as she has Roy.

I generally refer to Josie as “stupid,” but in reality, she is pretty smart for a four-legged mammal who drinks out of the toilet and chews on a rubber pig for fun.

When we plan any trip or activity, I plan what to pack and who to visit and Roy plans for the dog. I love to stop and eat at a nice restaurant along the way on our frequent trips to see the kids. But we can’t do that with the dog along—unless we can find a spot that’s shady enough or warm enough, or just plain fine enough for the dog.

We once parked three blocks out of the way of a restaurant, so the dog was in a shady spot. That, while we strolled through the hot sun to get to the restaurant. But normally, she’s much nearer to us than that. Roy has been known to go out during a meal and move the car, so he has a better view of her circumstances. Now, I don’t want the dog to fry in the car, but I also dread the day when we invite her inside to enjoy a steak and fries and maybe some ketchup to dip them in!

It isn’t only when we travel that the dog lives well. She has chewed up countless dog beds, I presume in protest to the indignity of lying on the floor. She leaves them in absolute shreds while she commandeers the couch I had planned as a bunk for grandsons when they visit. Not that they would mind sharing with her one bit—she has them wrapped around her paw as well.

Josie is beginning to show her age—and aren’t we all? She’s getting gray around the muzzle, and she takes a little more effort to jump in the pickup for a hunting excursion. And after an hour or two of tramping through the tall grass and chasing pheasants, she’s pretty tired, but she and Roy still enjoy the outing!

But even this doggy-master romance has its rough patches. The dog came home with a limp and a sheepish air about her from their latest outing. I noticed with surprise that her best buddy had a bandage on his hand and an air of regret.

Turns out loading an aging dog is not so handily done as before and as Roy was helping her in, she caught her leg. Roy, not realizing this, continued to push and in her distress, Josie drove home her point by driving her teeth into his hand. She obviously felt bad about what was, for an animal, a purely instinctive survival action, but I couldn’t resist a little “jab” of my own.

“So, biting the hand that fees you, are you, dog? That is not very smart.”

She turned and gave me that grave, considering look she has, as though she’s mentally measuring me for a pine box and a hole in the ground.

Yeah, I don’t think I’d care to analyze any dreams that dog has about me!

Leave a comment

Filed under Humorous Column

Bringing up Josie

She was a cute and pudgy little puppy, rolling around in the grass with her brothers and sisters. When we picked her, we were sure we were getting a mild and easy to manage dog.

We brought her home, named her Josie and prepared to enjoy our puppy. And she was sweet and mild and calm….for about four days. That’s when it finally hit home that she wasn’t so calm and mild.

She desperately  wanted to sleep on the furniture, so we bought her a bed. She promptly ate the bed and continued to climb on to the furniture. She ate a pair of my glasses…well, she didn’t really eat them, she just chewed on them until I couldn’t wear them. Explaining that mangled mess to the eye doctor was fun!

She loves paper most of all..anything from toilet paper to books. So far she has eaten the address book, my Nancy Drew collection, a Christmas present for my daughter, the password book, two books of check-blanks and so many napkins, paper towels and random papers I have lost track.12247164_983928861645544_8685450468341935516_n

The house looks like the aftermath of a hurricane all the time and the only glass items that have been broken are the family heirlooms I didn’t have the foresight to put away. I have stripped the house of all the things I think she might go after, but it is true that I have less plastic canvas, balls of yarn and shoe strings.

11254574_990389220999508_7511491945115849196_n

Hurricane Josie!

Magazines are a favorite for Josie to take apart, she especially devours the Popular Mechanics and Sports Illustrated papers. She positively devoured a travel book on New York and has consumed a great many of my crossword puzzle books, that I always thought I’d never finish!

My beautiful old Christmas cactus, to large and fussy to be moved from its southern exposure, has taken a particular beating from her. No matter how often I shouted at her, she could never resist the urge to bite at the leaves and it was looking pretty sad. Now, I have chair all around it and while it looks like it’s in jail, it at least is making a recovery.

We were selective in what we put out for Christmas decorations, knowing she would be a factor. I put up the old Christmas tree instead of buying a new one as I had intended. I used all cheap, glittery plastic bulbs, so she couldn’t ruin my good stuff. The tree is unplugged half the time because apparently Josie doesn’t think lights are necessary and the bottom third has been relieved of its bulbs while Josie walks around with a permanent glitter mouth.

I truly believe that Josie will grow up and get better. This is what has kept her alive through bouts of jumping on the cupboards to help herself and growling matches with the cat. I look forward to the days when I don’t have to see her wandering into the living room with a butter paper hanging out of her mouth and my good lint roller stuck to her foot.

Until then, I’m just trying to survive “Hurricane Josie” and hoping that all the glossy magazines she is consuming don’t cause us an even more unpleasant reaction!

 

© Jackie Wells-Fauth and Drops In the Well, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jackie Wells-Fauth and Drops In The Well with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Leave a comment

Filed under Humorous Column