Well, folks, it’s 1 a.m. and here we are, up and at ‘em instead of down for the count. The world of the insomniac is something that is difficult to explain and it’s something that cannot be fully understood unless you, like me, suffer from chronic insomnia. However, I’ll attempt to give you some idea of the problem if you’d care to listen and for me at least, I’m not doing anything else, like sleeping, so I’ll take the time.
Where I should be sleeping…
There are signs that you could be a chronic insomniac. They include, but are not limited to, the following:
- If you find yourself watching the clock at 10, 11, 12, 1, 2…maybe even 3, you could be a chronic insomniac. In fact, a chronic insomniac can tell you what time it is without the necessity of looking at the clock. They judge it by the grit in the eyes and number of times they’ve twisted over in bed.
- If you find your mind racing on such wildly diverse and ridiculous topics as whether or not Donald Trump will make all of us wear our hair in stupid styles if he is elected president, you might be a chronic insomniac. If you get up and go to the bathroom and actually try out some possible hairstyles just in case, you are definitely in our league.
- If you worry in the middle of the night about how much time you spend worrying, you might be a chronic insomniac. If you worry about being up in the middle of the night, worrying about the time you spend worrying, you may be too far gone to get help!
- If you are currently experimenting with at least three different aids to help you sleep, you may be one of us. If those aids include Melatonin, muscle relaxants and warm milk, you are probably up in the top ten of chronic insomniacs.
- If you spend your late nights surfing the Internet, exploring such fantastic sites as “Ten things you didn’t know about Leave it to Beaver,” you are definitely suffering the late night, non-sleep blues.
I’ve tried everything from meditative yoga, to regular bedtimes, to eating or drinking certain things before bed. Did you know that if you eat egg yolks and drink pink lemonade two hours before bed, you will have a full night’s sleep? Of course, it doesn’t work, but I like pink lemonade and egg yolks, which is more than I can say for straight vinegar, which is another suggestion!
I have come to accept that being a chronic insomniac is a part of my life’s makeup and, just for the record, I hope it’s not a part of yours. However, if it is, come on over about 1:30 a.m. I’ll be drinking a big glass of vinegar and watching the “Ten Things I Didn’t Know (and didn’t want to) about Leave it to Beaver.” On second thought, just play the re-runs…that would surely put me to sleep!
© Jackie Wells-Fauth and Drops In the Well, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jackie Wells-Fauth and Drops In The Well with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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